California:
The Governor of New York is jogging with his dog
along a nature trail.
A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor's dog,
then bites the Governor.
1. The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon
the movie "Bambi" and then realizes he should stop because
the coyote is only doing what is natural.
2. He calls animal control. Animal Control captures
the coyote and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases
and $500 for relocating it.
3. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead
dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.
4. The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500,
getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting
his bite wound bandaged.
5. The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while
Fish &Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the
area is now free of dangerous animals.
6. The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds
implementing a "coyote awareness program" for residents of
the area.
7. The State Legislature spends $2 million to study
how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate
the disease throughout the world.
8. The Governor's security agent is fired for not
stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and
train a new agent with additional special training re: the
nature of coyotes.
9. PETA protests the coyote's relocation and files a
$5 million suit against the State.
Louisiana:
The Governor Bobby Jindel is jogging with his dog along
a nature trail. A Coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.
1. The Governor shoots the coyote with his State
issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent
$0.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.
2. The buzzards eat the dead coyote.
And that, my friends, is why New York is broke and Louisiana is not. |
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